During the Spring of 2011, Lauren spent 3 weeks volunteering in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. These are her stories (insert the "doink, doink" from Law & Order here)...
Week 1
What I’ve been up to…
I am serving alongside my mom and my friend Lisa with an organization called Compassion Family International. Peter and Elizabeth Abera are the couple who run CFI and they are amazing! Peter is Ethiopian and he married Elizabeth (from California) last year. They met while she was on a mission trip to Ethiopia and he was her translator. They are a great team and they love these kiddos!
CFI is essentially a drop-in center and school for young kids. They have a KG-1 (equivalent to pre-school in the US) and KG-2 (equivalent to kindergarten in the US) class, as well as breakfast and lunch for the kids. There are also older kids who come to hang out at CFI (and eat lunch) before or after their government school each day. There are currently 24 kids in the KG-1 and KG-2 programs, and several more who come from the government schools each day (up to 30 or so more).
In Ethiopia, the government school starts at 1st grade when a child is 7 years old. A child is expected to be able to read and write (in English and Amharic) at the entrance into 1st grade! Therefore, many of the poorest kids aren’t able to succeed in school because their parents did not have the money or the education themselves to prepare them for 1st grade. That’s where CFI comes in. The government selects the children that CFI serves based on income. The loving people at CFI meet their needs and prepare them for 1st grade, setting them up for success! CFI is a Christian organization and, although they are not allowed to teach the Bible, they “can’t control” what their volunteers do while they are here (Heehee!).
What our weekday schedule looks like…
We’re usually up by 7:00am or so (with the roosters and the sunshine).
8:00am – go downstairs for breakfast and chat with the other folks staying here (mostly adoptive families)
9:30am – walk to CFI (it’s about a 5 minute walk)
The kids are in class when we arrive, so it gives us about 30 minutes to prepare for an activity.
10:00am – snack time, followed by play/activity time
11:00am – kids go back to class; we go upstairs to regroup and organize a few things
12:00pm – walk to Guest Home for lunch and rest
1:30pm – walk back to CFI
The kids are waking up from their nap when we arrive.
2:00pm – Mom & Lisa do play/activity time while I stay in the office to organize the donation closet
3:00pm – parents begin picking up the kids
4:00pm – walk to Guest Home to rest
6:00pm – dinner either downstairs at the Guest Home or at a “clean” restaurant recommended by Peter & Elizabeth
8:00pm – in our room winding down for the day
There are lots of sounds outside our balcony door (dogs, roosters, goats, donkeys, people, cars, etc.) and we have a hard time falling asleep and staying asleep. Mom and Lisa have tried medicating themselves (Benadryl, Advil PM) and I use ear plugs!
NOTE: You may notice a lot of resting time in our schedule. Let me just say that I tip my hat to all teachers—especially pre-K and kindergarten teachers! It’s exhausting! Combine that with the major elevation change of being here and the overall differences of being in another country, and we need lots of rest!
What we do…
For activities, we have done everything from making wind socks to coloring to playing with sidewalk chalk and bubbles to playing dodgeball. Mom has a lot of neat craft activities that we will do with the kiddos (like the wind socks) and we have other play activities as well (games, balloons, etc.). We tie in Bible stories to each of the craft activities—very much like Vacation Bible School in the US. The kids generally know about Jesus. Most of the folks in this area are Orthodox Christian, although some are Protestant; only a handful are Muslim.
I’m definitely in my comfort zone when I’m organizing the donation closet! That truly is my gift and I am so happy that it’s a need that they have! And I think they are grateful that I’m willing to do it. I keep trying to tell them that I’m not just willing to do it—I’m happy to do it! I’ve made a lot of progress so far, and there is a lot more to do. It’s been good in other ways as well because I’m able to identify items that they have PLENTY of and suggest that we distribute those to other organizations who might need them. I’m excited that we’ll get to do some of that next week!
An interesting behavior…
If we give each child one crayon/marker/paint pen, they are perfectly content and they share very well. However, if we put too many out at once, they all try to hoard and they do not share at all. The same goes with balls/balloons/bubbles. If we only bring out a few for the kids to play with, everyone is happy and they play well together. However, if we bring out too many, they fight over them and everything gets ruined.
It was frustrating and confusing to me at first that Elizabeth wouldn’t want us to give each child an entire box of crayons (we seriously have PLENTY!), but now I totally get it! In Ethiopia, many people have very little and are not sure when the next [fill in the blank] will come. Therefore, they will happily share with their friends/neighbors if what is needed is in front of them. However, if too much is presented as an option, the hoarding instinct kicks in and they get very possessive and nobody wins.
Home visits…
We will have the opportunity to go along with Peter & Elizabeth to home visits on some evenings. They have decided to “walk a mile in the shoes” of each of their CFI kiddos to understand the home situation of each one. Some of the kids have to walk an hour each way to get to CFI! Mom and Lisa got to go on two home visits one evening, but I had to miss out because I had a conference call with our adoption agency. From their recap, it sounds like it was an unforgettable experience. One-room mud huts the size of our bathroom, intermittent access to running water, extreme poverty, poor health, etc. It certainly gives you perspective—and an appreciation for where these kiddos are coming from (literally). The good news is that most of the kiddos have a lot of love in their homes! I hope to get to go on a home visit before we leave!
Weekends…
We PLAN to do some “touristy” things on the weekends, but today (Saturday) got derailed due to sickness. Hopefully we’ll all feel good enough to go to the English-speaking Ethiopian church service in the morning, and then be back on track health-wise for the week ahead!
Feeling very honored…
Before Lisa arrived, Mom and I were invited to an Ethiopian birthday party. The party began at 10:30am, was in honor of the cutest little 3-year-old twins (a boy and a girl), and was held at their home. For the special day, they wore traditional Ethiopian outfits (as did the mom and dad). The party started with some praise music, a devotional, and a prayer (all in Amharic). Then it was time to eat! As the international guests, we were considered the guests of honor and were asked to get our food first. We served ourselves traditional Ethiopian injera and tibs, then took our seats back on the couch and dug right in! I think the Ethiopians were impressed that we knew how to eat it (with our hands) and we liked it!
After everyone finished eating, they brought around the hand washing pitcher for us. It was such a sweet gesture—they didn’t want us to have to get up to wash our hands so they brought it to us! Then they started the coffee ceremony by burning incense, roasting the beans, and serving the popcorn—I LOVE this “ceremony!” When it was time for the cake, I noticed that the Ethiopian tradition differs a bit from the American tradition. Instead of blowing out the candle, the birthday boy and girl are the ones who cut the cake. They were given a knife and they went to town while we all laughed and cheered and took pictures. It was somewhat like the American wedding tradition of the bride and groom cutting the cake.
Again, we were served first. The cake was delicious! It was a white cake with white filling and icing. After that, we were served the coffee. I have grown to love coffee, and especially freshly roasted and brewed Ethiopian coffee! It is served in a very small cup (since it’s very strong) and this time it had sugar in it (for which I was very grateful). It was simply delicious!
By this time, it was about 1:30pm and we were feeling the “itch” to say goodbye. After a bit of time, we were prompted to stand and leave. We said many “thank you’s” and did lots of cheek kissing and hand shaking, then took one final picture and headed out the gate. We made it back to our room by 2:00pm. We are VERY grateful that we were invited to the party! It was a great time and we enjoyed some great food and drink!
My observations…
Ethiopians are friendly—with each other and with foreigners.
Even though we “stick out” because of the color of our skin, we feel very safe (and we are staying in a very poor part of town).
Addis Ababa is extremely crowded and the driving is insane!
The kids are SO happy and they love us! Lots of hugs and kisses!
In comparison to America, everything is smaller in Ethiopia—the people, the animals, the cars, the chairs, etc.
Ethiopians are hard workers.
The weather is beautiful here this time of the year.
Love and affection is a universal language!
My takeaways…
Be content with what you have.
The best way to “help” others: love, educate, empower, and encourage—in Jesus’ name.
God stuff…
I think I had the expectation that I would come over here and instantly feel God “working” in me. Well, I’m realizing that I can’t force that to happen. I may not have a major revelation while I’m over here and I’ll have to be OK with that. I just need to love on these kiddos in the way that Jesus would and I need to organize that closet to the best of my ability and with a cheerful attitude. That will give God the most glory, and that’s what God has called me to do.
Week 2
This week my body was healed, my “cup” was filled, my eyes were opened, and my heart was broken. Needless to say, it was quite a week jam-packed with all kinds of emotions!
Body Healed / “Cup” Filled
Thanks to your prayers and some very strong antibiotics, on Sunday morning I woke up feeling SO much better! Mom, Lisa, and I went with Peter & Elizabeth to an Ethiopian church service that was all in English.
Worship…Ethiopia Style!
I didn’t realize how low my “cup” was until the praise music started. Wow. I started crying almost immediately. Why cry? I was overwhelmed with God. His presence. His love. His strength. His everything. And I was overwhelmed with my environment. Worshipping alongside Ethiopians. People who look like my daughter. I had so many emotions going through me that I couldn’t process them all.
But God, oh, God. He is so worthy to be praised!
Due to my travels, I had not attended any sort of worship service with other believers in several weeks. I seriously didn’t know how much it would affect me, but I needed that service so badly. And God knew.
We met in a large building with banquet-style chairs and a stage similar to any contemporary church in the U.S. There was a band, a praise team, and a music pastor. There were screens where the words to the songs were projected and a nice sound system. The music pastor had SO much energy it was crazy! And it was ALL about God. It was awesome to worship in that environment—an environment very much like my church home at the Bridge! Well,… OK,… there were definitely some differences,… but the subject of our worship was the same—and that is what matters. I just kept thinking how awesome it must feel to God to have so many of his children all over the world worshipping Him. It has to make Him smile!
The pastor was very engaging and he made sure that he had his congregation’s attention the entire time. His sermon was on how we enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise (Psalm 100:4). He explained it as follows: our thanksgiving and praise are like our right foot and left foot and when we enter His gates and courts, His presence will CHANGE us. Not sure if that really made sense the way I explained it—it was obviously much better explained in person by the pastor. J He also taught about blessing versus reward (Genesis 12 and 15). The reward is God and God alone. If you understand that, you can find the blessing in any situation.
It was neat to hear him speak to “his people” about the blessing versus reward part. Think about it. Ethiopia is known for its poverty. And there are many people here who are preaching the prosperity gospel (if you follow Jesus, you will have many material blessings). Obviously, that is NOT the true gospel, so many people then get turned off by Christianity because they don’t see the material blessings. The pastor explained to all of us that we should focus our praise on the reward (God) and not on our chains. Only then will we find the blessing. (He used the example of Paul and Silas in prison.)
Another really cool moment was before his sermon. He got up to give a report on the situation in Japan. Apparently they had taken up a special offering the previous Sunday that would go straight toward the recovery efforts in Japan (they have a connection to a pastor over there). The pastor reported that they had collected over $3,000 USD to send to Japan. He read a letter from the pastor in Japan thanking the congregation in Ethiopia for the money and he showed pictures of the devastation in Japan. He was so proud when he announced to the congregation “Doesn’t it feel good that we are not the mission field in this situation?! We’re the ones providing aid!” So cool.
Ice Cream Sundaes, Caramel Macchiatos, and PB&J’s…Oh, My!
This week, God totally provided many of my “comfort foods” and I couldn’t be more thankful! First, we went to the only restaurant in Addis that has a soft-serve ice cream machine. I ordered the “Jamaica”, which is vanilla ice cream with chocolate sauce and caramel sauce. Yummo! On a different day, one of the guys from the Guest House invited us to Kaldi’s for coffee. I ordered a caramel macchiato and a plate of French fries. It was exactly what I needed! Seriously the best caramel macchiato I’ve ever had—and the fries were fresh and hit the spot!
Saturday morning, we went with Peter & Elizabeth to a mountain here in Addis. After touring the original “palace” and adjacent museum, we went for a short hike and a picnic! We truly got to experience some of the beauty of Ethiopia during this time! We were up in the wooded mountains, the weather was perfect, and the air was clean (unlike the polluted air in downtown Addis). The trees provided just the right amount of shade and we found the perfect picnic spot. Elizabeth had prepared pb&j sandwiches (which happen to be one of my favorite “comfort foods”), popcorn, raspberry yogurt, fresh mangos, and cookies. It was truly the perfect picnic!
I thank God for being my Healer, for always providing what I need, when I need it, for caring about the “little things,” and for being truly worthy of my praise!
Eyes Opened / Heart Broken
In addition to our daily service with the kiddos at CFI (as detailed in my last email), we were able to experience some other ministries around Addis this week.
Leprosy Hospital
We got to know a couple who were here on their second trip to pick up their baby boy. They mentioned that they wanted to go to the leprosy hospital to buy some items made by the patients. We had never heard of this, but were certainly on board to go with them! And we’re SO glad we did!
As you may know, people with leprosy are considered outcasts to society—at least in Ethiopian society. They are shunned and unable to find work. What a terrible feeling! So, here in Addis, they have built a hospital for these people and have found ways for them to have a job making craft items. Not all lepers are able to come here—many of them live in Korah, which is where the city dump is. I’ll talk more about Korah next week, as we will be going there on Thursday.
Anyway, as we drove up, it was SO different that what I had pictured. We entered an entire community which was actually the ALERT Hospital. It was a beautiful wooded area with several small buildings and a road that lead through it. Among all of the clinic buildings, we arrived at the craft area. There were several older ladies and gentlemen making various items—table cloths, doormats, bedspreads, scarves, etc. And, as we looked closer and spoke to them, we realized that many of them were without appendages (due to the leprosy). Wow—what amazing people! Losing fingers doesn’t stop them from life—even if their job is spinning cotton! Did I mention that? There were ladies spinning cotton into thread. I don’t know if I had ever seen that in person before. Very cool!
After talking to many of the people, we were lead up some stairs into a building. The sign said “Craft Shop.” It was SO neat to shop for items that we knew had been made by the people we had just met. These items are beautiful! If you visit our home once I’m back in Sugar Land, you’ll see many of the items that I bought!
Government Orphanage
Thankfully, our baby girl did not spend many of her days in an orphanage. She was transferred to Hannah’s Hope (our agency’s transition home) very soon after her birth mother relinquished her rights. We knew that Hannah’s Hope was not the reality of most orphans; however, I must be honest and say that I did not exactly want to know reality. I was quite happy to think that all orphans were taken care of in an environment like Hannah’s Hope—even though I knew that wasn’t the case. Ignorance is bliss, right?! We were able to “avoid” the trip to a government orphanage with our agency because our agenda was too packed on our first trip. However, Peter & Elizabeth said that they would like to take us to a government orphanage, so there was no getting out of it for me!
Upon our arrival at the orphanage, I was pleasantly surprised to see a new, nice building. We found out from the Director that the building was recently built by donations from adoption agencies in Spain. As we entered the main door, I was struck by how minimal everything looked. There was NO color, there were NO toys, and there were very few pieces of furniture. There were a handful of toddlers in the room, sitting in a circle on the floor with a caretaker. They weren’t playing a game or having fun—they were sitting still waiting for lunch. I was sad right off the bat. The Director was nice enough to take us on a tour of the orphanage, and she accepted the small duffle bag of donations that we brought for them.
She showed us the bedrooms for the older children—metal bunk beds lining the walls with thin mattresses. The only colors were on the mis-matched sheets. She then showed us the infant rooms—tiny metal cribs with thin mattresses. The only colors were on the mis-matched sheets. The first room we entered with babies in it was the room where the infants stay until all of their medical tests are complete. It was a fairly small room with several cribs and two caretakers. The babies were TINY. The Director explained that many of these babies are abandoned or thrown in the trash. The police find them and bring them to the orphanage. Pure sadness.
We went from that room to a connecting room and immediately the smell overwhelmed me. It was the main infant room where the majority of the babies were. The first thing I saw was one child vomiting and two others in adjacent cribs playing in the vomit. We alerted the Director and she had one of the caretakers clean it up. There were SO many babies in the room—many sharing a crib with another baby. Some were tiny infants and some were already crawling. Many looked like they could easily climb/fall out of their cribs. The flies were overwhelming in that room. They did have several fly strips hanging from the ceiling, but they were filled with dead flies and therefore, no longer effective at catching more flies.
It was eerily quiet in the room. I had heard about this before, but to experience it was heart-wrenching. The babies realize very early on that their cries will not be answered, so why cry at all. They realize that their only form of communication doesn’t work. Awful. Many of the babies had bottles—even the tiniest of babies had learned to hold/prop their bottles on their own. We walked around and touched and talked to all of the babies. One of the tiniest babies had the biggest brown eyes that were so sad. Those eyes are still haunting me.
From the infant room, the Director lead us to the room where the children with “mental disabilities” were. It was heartbreaking to be lead to the old building. The only children who are kept in the old building (behind the newly built facility) are those with special needs. They are isolated from the “normal” kids. Appalling. I know that this part was especially hard for my Mom, who is a special education teacher. To see these kiddos isolated was extremely difficult. The room they were in was very small. Each child was in his/her own crib or bed. There were 6-7 kiddos in the room and there was one caretaker in there feeding one of the kids. We spoke to and touched each child and gave them stickers. It was clear that not all of them had mental disabilities. One or two possibly had Cerebral Palsy, and one possibly had Autism. Can you even imagine being isolated like that for your entire life?
When we went back into the main room, the toddlers were finishing up their lunch (looked like oatmeal of some sort). We played with them for a bit and handed out stickers. We noticed that many of the children had soaked through their diapers so much that they were leaving puddles with each footstep. More heart-wrenching realities.
Let me explain that the caretakers were certainly nice and kind and I’m sure they do the best that they can. The problem is that there aren’t nearly enough of them. The Director told us that the ratio of child to caretaker is 10:1 at that orphanage. To give you a comparison, at Hannah’s Hope, the ratio for the babies is 2:1 (for the older kids, it’s a bit more like 4:1). The government orphanages are just completely understaffed and it’s because they are underfunded. Terrible. These babies need more stimulation. They need more affection. They need to be held more. They need love. They need a family.
If this has tugged at your heart even a tiny bit, please consider supporting adoption. Pray about it and truly be open to what God calls YOU to do about the orphan crisis. Don’t wait for someone else to step up—YOU step up! Don’t get overwhelmed by the number of orphans—just help ONE! (“Don’t fail to do something because you can’t do everything.”) I believe that, while God doesn’t call all of us to adopt, He does call all of us to do something to defend the cause of the orphan. What will YOUR response be?
I thank God for loving all of us—no matter what our flaws, diseases, disabilities. And I thank Him for showing me His heart this week.
Week 3
Going “Native”
Before church on Sunday morning, Lisa and I decided to go get our hair braided. I went full-out and got corn rows, while Lisa went much more en vogue and got 4 small rows on each side and then her hair “poofed” in the middle. She looked like a runway model. I looked like a WNBA player. J Actually, I kind of liked it, but it was super painful. They pull the braids so tight—I swear it was like I got a face lift! After 2 days of the braids, my head hurt so bad that I had to take them out. While I had them in, it was fun to see people’s reactions. You see, when a white girl gets corn rows, her white scalp becomes very obvious. Whereas, when a darker skinned person has them, there isn’t much contrast between their hair and their scalp. The kids at CFI loved them! They liked to touch the braids to see what they felt like. It was cute!
Street Kids
We were able to visit a couple more ministries in Addis this week. First up was Onesimus Children Development Association—a street kids’ ministry. We went during a time when there weren’t many kids there, but we did get to meet with the social worker to hear about their ministry. He was very kind and told us all about the ways that they serve these children—and in some cases, their families. Let me back up and define what a “street kid” is. These children are either orphans or they have extremely poor families. They survive off of begging and selling food that they find in the garbage. If they did have the opportunity to go to government school, many of them either fail out, are kicked out for behavioral problems, or their families don’t let them attend because they are needed to help provide income for the family. Thus, they become a “street kid.”
The social worker gave us a tour and introduced us to some of the other staff who were there that day. We first met the soccer coach and gave her some brand new soccer balls (thanks to so many of you who generously donated!). She told us about the soccer program and how they play in tournaments, etc. We saw their uniforms hanging on a clothing line and a picture of the team hanging above her desk. Other than the obvious differences of being in a third world country, this soccer program is just like any in the US. Our next stop in the small little compound was the kitchen (tiny and hot), then the accountant’s office (tiny and slightly less hot than the kitchen), then the social worker’s office (tiny, hot, with 3 desks jammed together). On our way out, we stopped to play a quick game of checkers with one of the boys—fun!
One of the barriers to serving a street kid is that they have never lived with rules. They do what they want, when they want to. So, many of them don’t want the help that these ministries provide because that would mean they would have to follow someone else’s rules. It’s a very sad cycle that ministries like Onesimus are working hard to break. They provide a place for the kids to come for meals, tutoring, playtime, and character development. The people who work at Onesimus open their hearts and pour into these kids!
Korah
We met one of the neatest ladies at breakfast one morning and, during the usual “get to know you” questions, we learned that she was there to serve in Korah. Now, by this time, I had heard a LOT about Korah—I had heard that it was the area of Addis where the trash dump is and where the poorest of the poor live, I had heard that a lot of the people with leprosy live there, I had heard of the various ministries that have recently started there, and I even have one friend who will be living and serving in Korah for about a year. So, we asked Eve (that’s the neat lady’s name) if she would mind letting us tag along one day. After checking with her team, she said it wouldn’t be a problem at all. Yay!
Eve is such an inspiration and proof that one person with a servant’s heart and obedience to Christ can make a HUGE difference! Check this out: She came to Ethiopia for the first time last year with a team of 3 nurses and 3 social workers (she’s a social worker). She ended up serving in Korah and, upon meeting a lady named Belenesh, she knew exactly what her purpose was—she was meant to start a family sponsorship program for the neediest families in Korah. She connected with the “Men of Korah” (these amazing guys who grew up in Korah and are completely sold out for Christ and LOVE to serve others in Korah—AMAZING guys!), who are part of Great Hope Church in Korah, and there was born the ministry called “Hope for Korah!”
She started by being the sponsor for Belenesh and her family. She worked with the Men of Korah to determine how much money would be needed to meet this family’s basic needs. She provided the money and the Men of Korah did all of the “leg work.” Within a year, they moved B and her family to a larger home (we’re talking about a room the size of most of your bathrooms—but it was a HUGE improvement from the closet-sized home with no windows where she previously lived), purchased a new mattress for her, provided the ingredients (usually just the tef flour to make injera, some oil, rice, and lentils) for them to have two meals a day (the norm is one meal a day), got her the medicine she needed for her ailments, and most importantly, put a smile on her face and the faces of her children.
I absolutely LOVE the way that Eve and the Men have approached this ministry. They pray…and they pray BIG! And they are obedient. Their vision for this family sponsorship program is in stages. The first stage is essentially doing triage on the family—get them medicine, shelter, and food. The later stages include finding out their gifts/talents and setting them up to be income-generating. This obviously leads to the final stage, which is when the family is self-sustaining—giving them back their dignity. I LOVE this approach! And apparently so does my Mom, as she became the first ever sponsor in the Hope for Korah ministry!
On the day that we tagged along with Eve and her husband Dave (who is also an amazing man of God and is fully supportive of his wife’s “crazy” calling in life), we got the opportunity to meet the family that my Mom is sponsoring. It was so neat for my Mom to meet Salemnesh in person, hug her neck, talk to her (through a translator—one of the Men), etc. Salemnesh is only one year older than me and she has four children and is a widow. My Mom is also mother to four children and a widow, so it was really cool to see that connection with the two of them. What’s also really cool is that Mom didn’t hand-pick Salemnesh—she just asked Eve which family had the biggest need. God is cool like that. I know that it will be a huge blessing for my Mom to pour into Salemnesh’s life—from all the way across the world. And it will be amazing to see the changes in Salemnesh’s family through this sponsorship program. First on tap for her family is a trip to the doctor for all of them to have a complete work-up, then moving them to a bigger home (her current home is literally the size of a pantry—and 5 people live there). I can’t wait to visit her on my next trip to Ethiopia!
We also got to tag along on two home assessments that Eve was conducting that day. Basically, the Men have identified the families in Korah who have the biggest immediate needs. Eve then visits the homes with the Men and they conduct an assessment. Basically, she asks them about their family and their life—how many people live there, all of their names and ages, who does what (work, school, begging, getting water, etc.), what the income of the home is, how much their rent is, how many meals they eat a day, what the state of their health is, what their interests are, etc. She will do a write-up of each family in order to get sponsorships for them.
If you’re interested in learning more about this ministry and (hopefully) becoming a sponsor, please check out hopeforkorah.blogspot.com (soon to be hopeforkorah.com). I’ve been there first-hand and witnessed the needs of these families—they are real. I’ve also met the Men who do all of the on-the-ground work, using the money provided by the sponsors—and they are legit. Their hearts are in the right place, they have accountability with the money, and they truly care about these families.
More Home Visits: Some Good, Some Not-So-Good
As I mentioned in my first week recap, part of the ministry that CFI does is that they “walk a mile in the shoes” of each of their kiddos to understand the home situation of each one. This week, I got to participate in three home visits! One was heartbreaking (and awkward), while the other two were encouraging.
First up was Kalkedan (age 5). We knew from spending time with her every day at CFI that this little one has a rough home life. Her mother has mental health issues and her father has stomach ulcers. The father should be providing income for the family, but he blames everything on the ulcers and says he can’t work. Not only does that put the family in the absolute poorest situation, it also means that there is no money for the mother’s medication. Two days before our visit, we noticed a drastic change in Kalkedan’s demeanor at CFI. She became extremely clingy to us, and her eyes were just SO sad. We found out that her mother had disappeared during the night. Yep, that would explain little Kalkedan’s demeanor.
The evening of our home visit, Kalkedan was SO excited that we were walking home with her from CFI! She held our hands the entire 45 minute walk, and she sang our names…”Lisa, Lauren” (pronounced “Leesa, Lion”). It was so nice to see the happiness back in her eyes; although, it was heartbreaking to know that we were only visitors—we would have to leave after a short visit. When we arrived at her house, I didn’t realize it was actually a house. It was a VERY small one-room mud hut with a tin roof. We later learned that it was considered “government housing” (their family qualified because of the dad’s ulcers). We were greeted by Kalkedan’s older sister, Helen (age 11). She was SO excited to see us and gave us lots of extra cheek kisses than the usual greeting involves!
Helen and Kalkedan lead us inside the house and we were surprised to see that the mom was there! I originally thought this was a positive thing, but later realized that it’s almost better if mom isn’t there when she’s not on her meds (because her mind isn’t there). We were seated on the edge of the bed (as in most houses, there is one bed that all of the family member share) and played with Helen and Kalkedan while Peter and Elizabeth talked to mom and dad. We realized (even without knowing Amharic) that mom was speaking gibberish and not making any sense. After 5 or so minutes in the house, we got the cue that it was OK to go with Helen and Kalkedan outside to play. We were incredibly relieved to be out of the cramped (and smelly) quarters.
Lisa and I were playing “photo shoot” with the girls outside. They each had our sunglasses on and were striking poses for us to capture. It was SO cute and it surprised us that the girls knew how to strike those sassy poses—I guess girls will be girls no matter where they live! Our fun time was quickly interrupted when we noticed that mom had come outside. She was dancing and chanting out in the road next to the house. The girls didn’t even bat an eye. They just wanted to play with us. Then things escalated with mom when she took off her shirt and continued to dance and chant out in the road. Apparently all of the neighbors know of her mental state, as most of them just looked the other way. Luckily, one older lady tried to get her shirt back on her and get her to stop. The shirt only stayed on for a split second before it was off again. Once again, the girls didn’t even bat an eye. That made me very sad because I realized this must be “normal” for them.
Oh, do you know how badly Lisa and I wanted to “save” the girls and just bring them home with us?! It was SUCH a sad situation. When it was time to leave, the girls walked with us all the way to the next house before they said goodbye. Mom was still in the road half naked when we left. In response to her experience, Lisa decided to provide the money needed for the mom’s medication. Please pray that Peter and Elizabeth can find a way to make sure that the mom actually takes the meds. And please pray for Helen and Kalkedan. [Update: in July, we heard that mom is taking her meds and the family is healing--praise the Lord!]
The next home we visited was little Fortuna (age 5). She is being raised by her great aunt because her mother passed away a couple of years ago. Even though their home was still a one-room mud hut with a tin roof, it was bigger and with a much higher ceiling than any I had previously been in. It was also part of a small compound of sorts, which made it much more “homey.” Fortuna’s great aunt is old, but wow—she loves that little girl and it shows! It was so refreshing to be in a home filled with love—even in extreme poverty.
From Fortuna’s house, we walked to Yabsira’s house. Poor little Yabsira (age 5) had been home sick from school for a few days, and sure enough, she was asleep when we arrived at her house. Similar to Fortuna’s house, Yabsira’s house is in a compound and it’s very small with only one room. However, Yabsira’s house has concrete walls and floor, which means it stays drier than the mud houses during the rainy season. Yabsira lives with her mother, and it’s another very loving environment. Her mother had taken little Yabsira to the doctor to get the proper medication and was allowing her to rest and get better. There were photos of Yabsira on the walls, and the crafts she had made at CFI were proudly displayed. So sweet!
Thank you, Lord for showing me that children thrive most in a loving FAMILY...no matter what that family may look like or where that family may live.
